Daniel Jackson awoke slowly, not knowing how long he had slept for and for some reason expected to see his bedroom as usual. He expected to be able to get up and grab a coffee, head for the shower and out of the door... except...

Unless he'd felt really masochistic, he had not bought himself a stone bed. He also did not live in some kind of makeshift dwelling... and he had not moved in with a bunch of strange looking primitive types who were, at this moment, in deep meditation standing over him. Daniel opened his eyes wide, gasped with realisation and tried to sit up. Only... he was tied down. He struggled with his bindings but realised it was all in vain.

"Where am I and what the hell do you think you're doing?!" Daniel yelled, making two of the five jump back in shock. He glared at them and demanded that they let him go, but got no response.

"Where are my team mates?!" he demanded.

No answer.

Daniel lay back and was aware that he felt bruised and battered. Well, at least that must mean he'd put up a fight. Or fallen down some stairs. He preferred to believe the former but with his track record, the latter was equally believable.

It hadn't taken Colonel Jack O'Neill long at all to wriggle out of his bindings, lay out the sentries and go on the hunt for his team mates. With his military experience and general hate for being bound up like a piece of poultry, he'd started work on getting free as soon as he regained consciousness. And that raised a good point. He wondered where he was. It seemed to be an underground complex of some kind, hewn into solid looking soil and rock. When he left the small room he had been previously confined to, he found himself in a fairly wide corridor, lit with torches and stretching for quite a distance. He could see doorways and windows at regular intervals along the passageway in both directions, and wasted no time in proceeding to search for his colleagues.

They had to be around here somewhere.

O'Neill had to admit he was getting a bit fed up with this being captured, having to escape and having to try and find the Stargate so they could get home deal. He kept his mind on the task in hand, going from doorway to doorway, thankful that no-one was around... which struck him as a bit suspicious but never mind. He also wished that these damn alien races would stop consficating the team's weapons. What O'Neill could really have done with at that moment was his trusty MP5, but no. He tried to stop himself in mid thought. These people really did not want to see him in a bad mood. And more to the point, being pissed off was a crap way to start the day.

So, Colonel Jack O'Neill continued to make his way down the corridor, hoping like anything he was going in the right direction.

Daniel Jackson was finally released from his bindings, sat on the edge of the bed feeling lousy and accepted the food and drink that was offered him.

"So... what do you guys want?" he asked.

Three of the strange inhabitants looked at him with intense eyes, not saying a word. They were all dressed in simple tunics with comfortable looking hand woven trousers, had neat haircuts and looked... quite normal. It was just their manner that was strange. They were so deliberate in their actions, and looked like they could see into a person's soul. A male with deep red hair tied back in a loose ponytail sat flanked by two females, both with jet black hair and piercing blue eyes. The male had dangerous looking dark eyes - almost too dark.

"We were curious."

Daniel furrowed his brow.

"About..."

"About you. Your people. We wished to know more about the travellers from beyond the gate."

Daniel did not like where this was going. "And..."

"And now we know much more than we did." The male said, rising to his feet in unison with the females. He gave Daniel a polite nod. "Your wife is indeed beautiful. You must love her very much."

Daniel stared at the trio as they left the room.

"Hey!! Come back here!!" Daniel got up off the bed and pounded after them. "If you wanted to know about my world, then why didn't you ask me instead of violating my mind like that?!"

"The questions we wish to ask you would not have been able to answer. Our methods are much better."

"The hell they are!!" Daniel snapped.

"If you continue in this vein, we shall be forced to restrain you once more." The male spoke so calmly that he only served to heighten Daniel's anger.

"Haven't you ever heard of privacy?" Daniel was up close to the male, his eyes narrowed. "OK, we came through the gate. OK, you were curious, but to delve into my personal thoughts..."

"I do not wish to hear any more of this." The male turned, left the room and went out into the corridor. Daniel tried to follow but swore in frustration when he came up against a force field.

"Asshole!" he shouted, infuriated. He tried to force his way past the field but had no success. Annoyed, he sat down on the makeshift bed and wondered just what he was going to do next. He couldn't stay cooped up like this forever.

"Men!! You only think of one thing!" Sam Carter had been standing, minding her own business in the simple looking underground room, when one of what she supposed was their hosts had walked in, asked her a few questions and tried to put the moves on her. He was now doubled up on the floor, in dire agony as Sam had shown him what it was like to experience true pain.

She stood over him, hands on hips.

"Any more crap like that and I'm not going to be pleased."

The blond haired male looked up at her, his eyes smarting like crazy. "I am sorry... I did not... mean... to offend... you..." he gasped. "In our culture... it is the... custom... for... females to be... given as gifts..."

"How chauvinistic!" Sam exclaimed. "In my culture, we do things differently!"

"Obviously..." the male curled up on the floor, nursing his modesty. Sam sighed. Seeing as he was here, she may as well make use of him.

"So, before you go into a state of shock, why am I here? And where are my friends?"

"Uuuurgh..." the alien said.

"Just great." Sam said. She looked down and noticed the plastic key on the belt of the alien, appropriated it and let herself out of the room, hoping the guy on the floor had learned his lesson.

That was just too easy.

She walked down the corridor, looked left and right and tried to determine just where she needed to go. She had no idea where the other members of the team had been taken to and was desperate to find out. With aliens like that, she did not want to hang around for too long.

O'Neill edged along the corridor outside the room, listening out for any signs of movement. When he was content that there weren't any, he took a look through the open doorway next to him. There was nothing inside. He made his way silently to the next one, checked it and again found nothing. Then he heard voices.

"I am sick and tired of you screwing with my mind!!!"

O'Neill paused. The voice sounded familiar. And very annoyed.

He edged closer to the room it was coming from.

"We will find out what we want to know. There is nothing you can do to stop us." A calm voice replied.

"What do you think I am? A lab rat?"

That was when the sounds of general violence broke out. O'Neill peered into the room and was surprised to see Daniel Jackson grab one of the inhabitants by the collar, slam him against the wall, knee him in the guts several times, then pummel the alien with his fists.

O'Neill stared in shock.

"DOCTOR DANIEL JACKSON!! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!"

Daniel stopped dead and let go of the alien, who slid down the wall, stunned. He turned slowly and looked at O'Neill, greeting him with a mild mannered smile.

"Oh. Hi, Jack."

"Oh, Hi Jack... that's all you have to say for yourself?"

"Um... please let me out of here."

"Sure. The way you fight, you could break us out of here in no time at all."

Daniel smiled and made his way over to the door. O'Neill reached for the device he had acquired earlier and set about deactivating the force field. It was at that moment, the alien got up and was about to launch a revenge attack on Daniel.

"Daniel! Behind you!"

Daniel turned in time to grab the alien, sling him on the floor and kick him in the ribs several times.

"Will you... please... stop doing that... it hurts..."

"Yeah, right, pal... watch whose mind you read next time!" Daniel stormed out, joined O'Neill and looked up and down the corridor.

"OK, where do we go from here?" he asked, hands in pockets. He looked at O'Neill with inquisitive, enquiring eyes.

O'Neill looked at him, eyes wide open in disbelief.

"Danny... what did they do to you?"

"They probed my mind. And... kept taunting me with all the private stuff they found out..." Daniel looked at the floor, suddenly depressed.

"Well, that one's going to think twice before he tries that again. Come on, let's find the others."

Teal'c sat at a table, opposite a native of the planet with long black hair. The room they were in was rough in design, clearly underground and basic in terms of furnishings. Five similar looking inhabitants of the planet stood around the walls of the room, armed with Goa'uld energy staffs. Teal'c had looked at them with interest. Mainly as the possessors of the weapons looked like they had never fired anything resembling a weapon in their lives. Teal'c had woken up lying on the bed in the corner of the room, then had been beckoned to take his seat. And there he had been sitting ever since.

"I have asked you too many times already. What brings you through the gate?"

Teal'c looked at him with a bored statement. The alien was trying to be intimidating and was failing miserably.

"Well? Give me your answer!" he snapped.

Teal'c normally would have responded. The alien's opening tirade about Teal'c being in league with the Goa'uld and how the Goa'uld were only good for their resources had not helped. For the alien to continue with various other insults had not inclined Teal'c to say a word. Teal'c sat in silence.

"I am fast losing patience with you!" the alien shouted.

Teal'c tried to not yawn. He was able to maintain a serious manner at all times, and to handle a multitude of situations. This was the first time in a long while he had felt this unimpressed with anything. He guessed this alien was what the humans termed "crap".

After ten more minutes of pathetic ranting, Teal'c rose to his feet. The alien looked concerned. He had a right to be.

Teal'c reached across the table, grabbed the alien by the head and slammed him forehead first into the table. Any more of this and he would surely go insane. The guards levelled their weapons, and poised to fire. Teal'c capitalised on the moment, took a mad run at one of them, knocked him to the ground, relieved him of his staff and made short work of the rest. It helped that they were obviously not trained in combat of any kind.

Something caught his eye on each of their uniforms - something rectangular that looked like a key to some kind of device. He looked over to the doorway, saw a lock of some kind and inserted the key. It deactivated an energy field that had been blocking the door. Teal'c was glad he had not had to try that out. Now he just had to find his colleagues.

O'Neill was taking a look round the corridors, with Daniel in tow.

"Any ideas where Teal'c and Sam are?"

"Don't know." Daniel replied.

"Snap out of it, OK." O'Neill said, seeing that Daniel was in a foul mood. "If we see any more of those creeps, I'll let you do the honours."

"Fine." Daniel said. O'Neill chose a path and hoped that it was the right one. They followed it for what seemed like ages and reached a dead end. Daniel swore under his breath. O'Neill shrugged. They retraced their steps and took the other direction, wondering whether they would see any signs of life. They seemed to be in a quiet part of the dwelling, or whatever it was. They followed thepath and hoped they would get somewhere.

At last, they heard signs of life. Someone was being beaten up and forced to talk or something along those lines. Daniel didn't care. O'Neill had his suspicions about what was going on. He qietly crept along the corridor, then came face to face with Teal'c.

"Colonel O'Neill." he said, leaving the alien a lone for a moment. "I believe I have found out why we were captured and taken here. This race wishes to use our minds to give them information about building a stronger race."

"Or to use us for procreation purposes!" a voice chimed in. O'Neill looked up to see Sam approaching. "They're a bunch of filthy degenerates."

"Well, they didn't do a good job, did they? I came to, I got free and... here I am."

"Knew I forgot to do something..." the alien said. "Forgot to lock the door on your cell..."

O'Neill shook his head, not wanting to believe what he had just heard.

"These aliens are pathetic!" Sam Carter said.

"Tell me about it. Danny made wallpaper paste out of one of them without breaking a sweat." O'Neill said. He patted Daniel on the shoulder, smiling in approval.

Daniel blushed and smiled shyly. He could not help laughing. "They deserved it!"

Teal'c was deep in thought.

"Teal'c what's on your mind?"

"I believe I know of a way out of here."

Teal'c looked down at the hapless alien. This race could prove to have its uses after all.

Moments later he had led them to a wider part of the corridor. Teal'c looked up at a circle in the ceiling and then at his colleagues.

"Oh my god." Daniel shook his head in sheer disbelief. "They can't even come up with an original form of transportation. They've got Goa'uld teleportational devices. It's a wonder they know how to work them."

"Wait for me here. I shall be back soon." Teal'c walked down the corridor, a man with a purpose. The rest of the SG-1 team looked at each other, bemused. Moments later, he was back, dragging an unconscious alien with him. The alien was dressed in a manner that bought memories flooding back to O'Neill and Daniel. He had the clothing to resemble one of Ra's palace guards... but that was where the similarity ended. Teal'c propped him up against a wall, gestured for the team to take their positions and pressed the jewel that would activate the device. He joined the team and moments later, they were elsewhere.

They all trudged back to the Stargate, fed up and infuriated. Usually something challenging happened on missions like these, but this one had made them wonder why they bothered. Daniel was in a bit of a mood because of the aliens reading his mind, Teal'c was bored, Sam made a mad dash for the DHD as she was so desperate to get home and O'Neill whooped for joy when the puddle appeared in the Stargate. They all jumped through as fast as they could.

Moments later, they were flying through their Stargate, straight onto the ramp, and were glad to be back. Even though they wished that something could be done with the landing. Teal'c, O'Neill and Carter all got to their feet and dusted themselves down, while Daniel got up and stomped off, his face like thunder.

"Daniel - what's wrong?" one of the Sergeant Siler asked him.

"Get stuffed! I'm having a crap day, I feel like shit and I've had a whole load of shit happen to me!!" Daniel snapped, making a hasty exit to the door. Unbeknown to him, O'Neill was following.

"Daniel! Daniel, come back!!" he shouted.

"Leave me alone! I'm going to get really drunk!" Daniel shouted.

The next morning, the team were debriefed. Daniel was sitting quietly sipping hangover remedy. O'Neill didn't see the point in reporting anything about the aliens they had encountered at all and Sam didn't want to think about them. In the end, it was Teal'c who gave the full report.

"So... what are your findings on this planet? Any good for resources?" General Hammond asked.

"Don't bother going there." Daniel said, deadpan.

General Hammond looked at him in puzzlement.

"Oh... Danny here had a little run in with one of the residents." O'Neill said. "He... disagreed with just what they were doing and had to resolve the situation. He did admirably. The only problem is that their mind control techniques have given him the mood from hell."

Daniel gave a shrug and sipped some more hangover remedy.

"Never mind. Once he's over that hangover, he'll be OK." Hammond paused for a moment. "Dr Jackson... how did you get so bruised?"

Daniel turned a deep shade of red.

"General... you really don't want to know what kind of mission I've had!"

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